Concerning Twilight Sparkle
by TurkeySM
Summary: The sixth of many back-and-forth dialogues between a brony and a non-brony regarding My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. The lines that are in italics belong to the non-brony. This one was made with the help of a friend.


I'm part of Operation: Clip her Wings.

_Operation what?_

A crusade launched by bronies who really care about the show to lobby against Hasbro. We have three steps.

_...Crusade? Lobby? Against what?_

Alicorn Twilight Sparkle!

_What's an alicorn? Is that a teenage vampire or something?_

No, it's a pony goddess!

_A pony goddess. I see. Ok, so you want to lobby against a cartoon pony...goddess thing. That sounds, um, sensible._

You don't understand! She was once beautiful but now she's ruined!

_What was this Twilight Sparkle before? And before I forget, what's step one?_

Twilight Sparkle was a unicorn and a librarian, not an alicorn and a princess! And step one is to avoid watching the episode.

_Wasn't she Applejack's gardener? No wait, that person was constantly lying. Anyway, why avoid watching the episode? Wouldn't seeing it give you a better position to judge the change in this character?_

No, because if I watch it I might be brainwashed into liking it!

_Brainwash? Has this show ever forcibly influenced you to like anything before?_

I hated Cadance too until I saw the wedding episodes...then I was brainwashed into liking her!

_Ok, well I have no idea who this Cadance person—no wait, you probably mean pony—is, but perhaps you like her now because she was reasonably well-written?_

Maybe, but alicorn Twilight is different. You can't just become an alicorn, you have to be born one!

_Were the other alicorns' pasts ever shown? Maybe they were turned into alicorns too and you never saw it._

No, because the fans have decided that's not true!

_Wait, what? Aren't the show writers the ones who decide what's true and what's not true? Last time I checked for any series, fanon does not equal canon._

But bronies aren't like other fandoms. We're unique.

_Unique? How so? I thought the Star Wars, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings fandoms were already pretty unique._

None of those directly influence what happens on screen.

_So bronies have the power to affect things that happen in the show?_

Yeah, obviously.

_Wait, couldn't you just influence this alicorn Twilight decision then with your unique brony power? And wouldn't you have to actually watch the episode to know what to change?_

We are influencing it. Our plan is to get bronies not to watch the episode and to stop buying toys. That'll show Hasbro!

_So stop buying toys is step two?_

Yes.

_Isn't Hasbro mostly a kids' company? Wouldn't they just make money from their normal audience, the little girls who don't really care whether or not Twilight becomes some alicorn princess?_

No. Hasbro were founded in 2010.

_I thought they were founded in the early 1900s._

That's a lie! Bronies founded it! Stop changing the subject!

_Wait what? I'm not even a brony but I've had customer experience with Hasbro way before 2010!_

You're missing the point! Alicorn Twilight is terrible!

_How is she terrible?! I still don't get what you're talking about! Why are you making such a fuss over a child's cartoon character?_

She's more than that! She's MY character! Mine, my own, my precious!

_Whoa there Gollum, hold on! Doesn't she belong to Hasbro, the company that owns her property wise?_

She's Lauren Faust's brainchild and she hates the idea of alicorn Twilight.

_Did this Lauren Faust person say she hates the idea of alicorn Twilight?_

Somewhere I think!

_Somewhere. Anything more specific?_

No! Stop asking me to prove things!

_But shouldn't a loving fan of this pony series you love so much be willing to know all the information? I thought fans were data books of knowledge for their respective obsessions._

I make the rules! Not Hasbro, not DHX, not the Hub...me!

_But Hasbro, DHX, and the Hub MADE the thing you love! How do you decide the rules?! I get the whole concept of working to satisfy the customer, but I think you take it to an extreme, overdone level!_

Without us they wouldn't exist!

_But they already have the little girls along with the fans of all their other series. Bah, we're getting nowhere with this. Just tell me what step three is so I can let this all sink in._

Step three is that Hasbro realize that they can't survive without bronies watching their show and buying their toys and so they change Twilight back.

_...  
How many bronies would actively follow this plan anyway?_

All of them, or else they aren't true bronies.

_I'm sorry, the part of my brain that processes logical thought just burst into flames. While it's rebooting, please let me ask: are all the bronies you know true bronies?_

Surprisingly few of them, actually.

_So if there aren't a lot of true bronies, won't your plan fail since Hasbro won't bother with a few dissenting fans?_

We shout loud enough they'll hear us. They have to.

_I just...I don't even. Are you SURE you can't just watch the episode before exploding into flaming balls of unreasonable fury?_

You must understand. The show is dead to me already.

_It is dead to you already. Why are you complaining and planning this weird Operation: Clip her Wings then?_

So others can remember the show when it was good, before executive meddling.

_...Out of all the bronies I've met, you are by far the most absurd. Compared to those oddballs who tried to impersonate a pony, you who vehemently deny this pony you once loved a chance to be different are the worst this brony fandom has to offer. You should be ashamed of yourself! I have endured many migraines, but those had a laughable aspect to them. I cannot laugh or smile at all at your immaturity. You bite the hand that feeds you and you pretend to be its master. Your efforts will fail and you will be remembered as nothing more than another crying fool who could not stand the sight of change._

**[Fin]**


End file.
